More Insurance claim form funnies


This is sure to get you chuckling out loud. You couldn’t make it up even if you tried. Below are some real extracts from various UK Insurance Claim forms.


‘My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle’

‘I told the police I was not injured, but upon removing my hair, I found that I had a fractured skull.’

‘I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him’


‘The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.’


Question: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident? Answer: Travelled by bus?

‘There was no damage to the car, as the gatepost will testify’

‘A bull was standing near and the fly must have tickled him as he gored my car’


‘I had to turn the car sharper than was necessary owing to an invisible lorry.’


‘First car stopped suddenly, second car hit first car and a haggis ran into the rear of second car’

‘The accident occurred when I was attempting to bring my car out of a skid by steering it into the other vehicle.’

‘A dog on the road braked, causing a skid’


‘Wilful damage was done to the upholstery by rats.’


‘I unfortunately ran over a pedestrian and the old gentleman was taken to hospital much regretting the circumstances’

‘Cow wandered into my car. I was afterwards informed that the cow was half-witted.’

‘I ran into a shop window and sustained injuries to my wife’


‘As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no sign had ever appeared before, making me unable to avoid the accident.’


‘The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of the way when I struck the front end’

Author: Robert

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