More Milligan Magic

Look at all those monkeys
Jumping in their cage.
Why don’t they all go out to work
And earn a decent wage?

How can you say such silly things,
And you a son of mine?
Imagine monkeys travelling on
The Morden-Edgware line!

But what about the Pekinese!
They have an allocation.
‘Don’t travel during Peke hour’,
It says on every station.

My Gosh, you’re right, my clever boy,
I never thought of that!
And so they left the monkey house,
While an elephant raised his hat.

Down the stream the swans all glide;
It’s quite the cheapest way to ride.
Their legs get wet,
Their tummies wetter:
I think after all
The bus is better.

Said Hamlet to Ophelia,
I’ll draw a sketch of thee,
What kind of pencil shall I use?
2B or not 2B.

In the land of the Bumbley Boo
The People are red white and blue,
They never blow noses,
Or ever wear closes,
What a sensible thing to do!

In the land of the Bumbley Boo
You can buy Lemon pie at the zoo;
They give away foxes
In little Pink Boxes
And Bottles of Dandylion Stew.

In the land of the Bumbley Boo
You never see a Gnu,
But thousands of cats
Wearing trousers and hats
Made of Pumpkins and Pelican Glue!

Chorus
Oh, the Bumbley Boo! the Bumbley Boo!
That’s the place for me and you!
So hurry! Let’s run!
The train leaves at one!
For the land of the Bumbley Boo!
The wonderful Bumbley Boo-Boo-Boo!
The Wonderful Bumbley BOO!!!

There was a young soldier called Edser
When wanted was always in bed sir
One morning at one
They fired the gun
And Edser, in bed sir, was dead sir!

I’m not frightened of Pussy Cats.
They only eat up mice and rats,
But a Hippopotamus
Could eat the Lotofus

Such a beast is the Hipporhinostricow
How it got so mixed up we’ll never know how;
It sleeps all day. and whistles all night,
And it wears yellow socks which are far too tight.
If you laugh at the Hipporhinostricow,
You’re bound to get into an awful row;
The creature is protected you see
From silly people like you and me .